My man took me on a hot date last night to the Boston Opera House to see Les Mis. Apparently, it’s not pronounced lays miz-er-ob-lays, by the way. Who knew?
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Anyway, I learned some very important lessons last night while watching this fab musical opera thingy and I thought you might like to know. One of them was that if a character pretends to flap his fake manpart around, my husband will laugh…out loud…loudly..solo laughing. Here’s the rest:
Number 1. Climbing over something in lieu of walking around it, makes you look way tougher than you really are. The layman’s lesson: Climb over the couch instead of around it if you really wanna knock em’ dead.
Number 2. Singing everything you mean makes you awesomer. The layman’s lesson: Vow to only order your food while singing opera-style whenever at a restaurant for which your meal costs more than you make in a week.
Number 3. If you quit your factory job to become a whore, you will probably get a disease and die. The layman’s lesson: Don’t be a whore.
Number 4. Fake humping on a stage looks a lot like real life humping. The layman’s lesson: If you want to make your mate jealous, just dry hump something…anything. It will apparently look super real.
Number 5. If a street gang tries to ambush you, you should probably just hide out in a castle or something. The layman’s lesson: I have no clue what to say for this one.
Stay tuned for another great giveaway announcement coming tonight! I promise to never give lessons like this again, but I’m not going to pinky promise or anything, soooo you probably shouldn’t get your hopes up.
(photo via wikipedia)